Sunday, July 19, 2009

Tori Spelling and fake people

I have recently started a slight obsession with Tori Spelling. I watch her show and picked up 1 of her 2 books at the Library the other day. Now, I am not one for following stars and their everyday lives. I have never once watched any celebrity reality show until hers. Now, I think I am in love with her. Why? Well...here it goes.

When I watch the show I am constantly relieved that she is real...no matter if there is a a camera or not she appears to be herself all the time. I REALLY admire that in people. I know...I have often questioned am I me all the time...and this blog was meant to be the written out of the mental and physical acts that take me on my quest for self discovery. <-- That is NOT what I am talking about when I say being ones self.

In reading her book sTori Telling, I am amazed at how real she is and if further reiterates my feeling about people being themselves/real. She talks about her stupid mistakes and bad judgements. She pokes fun at her family and life in general. I feel like she is just about as real as it gets. And maybe, I can see some of me in her...or her in me...however that works out. Either way...I like her!

So...while recently discovering that being real is a quality that I desire in my friends, it made me reflect on those who I thought at one point or another were being themselves and later found out they were lying b****es. Yeah, kind of blunt, but I talking about keeping real.

I now that in certain circumstances we all take on diffrent personas. For example, I would bust out in church some of the language I might use while watching a UFC fight...but in both of those situations I am still me. I would, however, talk about the fight at church and church while watching the fight...if I wanted to. I guess I am relating the whole being fake to being two-faced. That is the best way to describe my feelings about people who portray one thing and then on another day portray something else.

As I have talked (written) before we have recently (in Dec. 08) moved from Franklin, KY. Franklin is a very Mayberry kind of town and I loved parts of it. When I started my blog I was still living there and was REALLY struggling with who I was...yes, it has gotten better...and here is why I think it has.

There was a very tight-knit group of women that I was involved with. We all went to the same church (that is how most of knew each other, while others had always lived there and they grew up together). We had monthly "Girls Nights In", we worked VBS and Sunday School together, we carpooled our kiddos to school, and just had a great time with each other. Then during or right before a retreat something changed. I don't know if it was that some new people had joined the group (which I was not opposed to, but they were not my style or I hadn't gotten the chance to really know them) or things were just in a normal mood of change, but things weren't right. Clique's started to break off (I am VERY anti-clique) and that is very normal as some liked doing things others didn't...the group got to be about 20-25 women.

This was also about the time where the true colors of some started to show. There were things that went on where best friends broke up while others began. Some were trying to fit in with the "popular (more well off $ wise, think they are better type)" while others were remaining who they were and were being seen as outcasts. It was freaking high school all over again! Stupid...I know. ANYWAYS... it was about that time that I started to re-evaluate those I was friends with and I why I was friends with them...2 GREAT friends emerged while the others seemed to become nothing more than acquaintances. Yeah...20-25 down to 2. Now that isn't to say there weren't some really great women in that group, but we were just different. I do, however, know that I could call on them and they would be there for me as best as possible.

So...this whole long story leads me to this... why are people so fake? Who are you trying to impress and why? My SIL (HI!) will tell you that I would be the first to tell you of a great purse find...not that it was a really Burberry and let you believe what you want, but that I got it at a yard sale for $2.50...yes, you read that right. I am trying to be me...stuff doesn't make me, people don't make me, money doesn't make...I make me. That doesn't mean I'm not constantly on a quest to find me, but (Kim are you reading) I think I am pretty darn awesome...if you don't like me...well...move on!

Fake people will find, in time, that they also have fake friends and lives. They will ultimately look back and see how unhappy they are. I don't want that! I want real people with real lives and real personalities. If you are real with me and I don't like it...I will either get over it or move on...and that is what I want people to do with me. DON'T change, DON'T conform....be you! Be who God made you to be...BUT if you aren't proud of who you are or too ashamed to let people see the real you...then is THAT who you really are?

Stop being fake!

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